Tips for a Joyful Season - After Divorce

Bridget Leschinsky

30 October 2024

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Tips for a Joyful Season – After Divorce:

Let’s face it, any holiday season can be challenging, but co-parenting following a divorce usually adds to the complexity. Holidays are filled with a wonderful blend of emotions, practical concerns, and a mix of traditions. Although feeling overwhelmed is natural, there are tips for a Joyful Season – After Divorce, the secret is to inhale deeply and be prepared. The circumstances can seem difficult, but let’s walk through how to co-parent well during the holidays.

Why Holidays Can Be Challenging for Co-Parents

The Mix of Emotions and Traditions

It’s hard to stay calm during the holidays. After getting divorced, this may be your first holiday without your ex. You may feel sad, angry, or guilty. Not being able to spend time with your kids on big holidays can be sad and make you feel alone. Remember that this is only temporary and is part of the longer time of getting used to things.

Navigating Time-Sharing and Parenting Plans

Sharing time during the holidays can cause stress or even anger. It can be easier if you go over your parenting plan ahead of time and talk about it with your co-parent. If you don’t have a clear plan, you might want to come up with one together.

Essential Tips for Stress-Free Holiday Co-Parenting

Tip #1: Plan Early for a Smooth Season

The #1 Tip for Successful Co-Parenting During the Holidays: Plan Early

Review the Parenting Plan

Start by reviewing the parenting plan and how you will spend time together during the holidays. You may be worried or even angry about sharing time, but having a good plan will help you handle things better. Talk to the other parent about how to split up time if you don’t already have a clear parenting plan. You can spend more time making memories with your kids instead of rushing around at the last minute if you take care of the details ahead of time. If you haven’t planned yet, you need to do it right away. Parenting plan tips and templates

Set Priorities Around School, Events, and Traditions

Look at the kids’ school plans, events, and family traditions that both parents want to keep. Your holiday season will be less stressful if you take care of these things as soon as possible.

Manage Emotional Challenges Mindfully

Handling the Emotions

Holidays are emotionally charged. If this is your first holiday after divorce, you could feel depressed, angry, or even guilty. Not spending a major holiday with your children can be rather distressing and lonely. Remember in these times that this is only temporary and within line with a longer period of adapting. Managing emotions after divorce

Acknowledge and Address Difficult Emotions

Instead of repressing your emotions, acknowledge them, and deal with them at your own pace. Recognize that you don’t have to let your emotions lead you.

Focus on Gratitude and Positivity with tips for a Joyful Season – After Divorce

Think about the good things in your life and how you can make the holidays fun for your kids. It’s fine to miss old habits. Instead, find new ways to have fun with your kids. You can choose to be grateful for what you already have. Kids pick up on stress very quickly, so keeping your feelings in check is important for their health. It’s normal to miss how the holidays used to be, but don’t let that stop you from giving your kids new, fun things to do. Creating new family traditions after divorce

Co-Parenting Through High Conflict Situations

Difficult Co-Parent Tips

Particularly in cases with high conflict, co-parenting isn’t always a seamless procedure. These useful techniques help one to handle the unavoidable roadblocks:

Balance Flexibility with Firm Boundaries

While flexibility is essential over the holidays, one should also hold boundaries. One parent’s last-minute wish to shift days can disturb things. Tell them kindly but firmly of the agreement until a real emergency develops. Flexibility ought to be two-fold rather than only one.

Keep the Focus on the Kids’ Experience with Tips for a Joyful Season – After Divorce

This season is about the kids, not about one-upping your co-parent. Steer clear of trying to outshine the other parent with gifts or activities since it will just cause conflict. Focus on being stress-free and valuing your time with your children.

Navigating Extended Family and Holiday Gatherings

Communicate Early About Family Plans

Extended family is a wild card during the holidays. If grandparents or other relatives requested certain days with the children, your co-parenting arrangement may be called into question. Talking early about extended family plans with your co-parent can help you to be ahead of this and create reasonable expectations among relatives.

Setting Clear Boundaries with Relatives

Avoid confusion by setting rules with your family. Setting clear limits keeps the focus on the kids’ fun and keeps things from getting too tense.

Staying Calm and Resolving Conflict Peacefully

Address Issues Before They Escalate

If schedule problems come up, take a deep breath and take a moment to think about what to do. Don’t get angry or mean with your co-parent, and if you need to, think about mediation to help the two of you work through the issue. Co-parenting communication app

When to Seek Help from a Mediator

If having direct conversations is hard, a mediator can help parents have productive talks that will make the holidays less stressful for everyone. Benefits of family mediation

Take It Step by Step for a Peaceful Holiday Season

Create a Holiday Plan and Take it in Stages

Holiday co-parenting is not something you have to perfect overnight. First create your plan; secondly, break it out into logical steps. From mastering emotions to setting boundaries with extended family, this process takes time.

Focus on the Wellbeing of Your Children

When things feel overwhelming, think about the well-being of your children. Giving this goal some thought can help you relax and avoid stress.

Need Help with Your Holiday Co-Parenting Plan? Contact for Guidance

If you’re having trouble with timing or feelings, you might want to talk to a family mediator. As a trained mediator and co-parenting guide, I can help the family have a peaceful and happy holiday season.

Take advantage of a FREE 15 minute discovery session with The Bridging Coach to ask questions and get help. 

Bridget Leschinsky is a CDC Certified Divorce Transition and Recovery Coach®

Photo by NATHAN MULLET on Unsplash

 

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